“Age 28, You Were a Plot Twist”

Celebrating my 28th birthday was… interesting. And honestly, there are parts I just can’t share because, whew, boundariessss. 😂 But from what I can say, year 28 showed up like a plot twist. It brought a wave of emotions I had carefully stuffed somewhere between my intestines… or maybe my buttocks. Don’t ask me how emotions end up there, but somehow they did — and then found their way to my heart just when I thought I had flushed them out for good.

I realized I missed being loved romantically. Not in a “Netflix rom-com, sweep me off my feet” kind of way (maybe sometimes), but in the quiet, simple ways. I missed being told I was beautiful, being seen. I missed the kind of hug that says “I miss you” without saying a word. I missed taking care of my man and being cared for back. I missed the random stares, the kisses that whisper “I want you.”

It’s funny because, truthfully, I didn’t even get much of this in my marriage — but I have experienced it before. This wasn’t about craving sex. This was about craving love. The deep, gentle, I see you kind of love.

I travelled for a few days for my birthday because, despite how it may look online, these past months have been mentally heavy. The kind of heavy where you’re functioning but barely surviving. The kind where you mask it so well, people don’t notice. The kind where even opening your Bible feels like climbing Everest, so you just loop sermons all day because you’re scared if you stop listening, maybe, just maybe, the darkness will win and thats why I have not been consistent with writing.

Lool. For someone who said she can’t share much, here I am slowly airing my laundry like it’s a neighborhood block party. 😂

But here’s the truth: This birthday, I felt loved again. In the weirdest place. For the shortest time. But it was real. And I’m holding on to it — not as a crutch, but as a reminder. A reminder that I will have my person one day. Someone I can love purely and innocently, who will love me back in the way I know I deserve and desire.

If there’s anything this birthday taught me, it’s that love is not something we should beg for, force, or shrink ourselves to receive. Love — real love — finds you when you’re not even looking, and it doesn’t just stop at romance. It’s in the way we show up for ourselves, in the way we let God hold us when we’re falling apart, and in the way we give grace to our own hearts while we wait.

So if you’re reading this and you feel the ache of wanting to be seen, held, and loved — I see you. God sees you. And until the right person comes, may we never forget that we are worthy of the gentlest, purest, most intentional kind of love… starting with the one we give ourselves.

Until then, cheers to 28. 🥂
I love you, Ifeoluwa.

4 responses to “The Birthday that broke me open”

  1. Foluke Avatar
    Foluke

    Happy Belated Birthdayyyyy 🎉❤️ I pray this new year God grants you perfect love 🫶

    What I’m taking with me from this post is that love is not something we should beg for, force or shrink ourselves to receive.

    Thank you so much for this lovely post ❤️

    Like

    1. Grace Avatar

      Amen! Thank you so much

      Like

  2. Priscilla Danladi Avatar

    Thank you for sharing,

    I can relate to you, I’m turning 27 and whooosh! I find myself craving the safest, purest love, I desire it but I’m not desperate. I believe it’s worth the wait❤️

    Like

    1. Grace Avatar

      I love that you desire it but are not desperate. I pray the Lord gives you your own at the perfect time

      Like

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Welcome to my little corner of the internet! I’m a proud single mom navigating the beautiful chaos of life one day at a time. This blog is my open diary—a place where I share heartfelt personal stories, lessons learned, navigating motherhood, the ups and downs of my journey as a single mom.

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