Diary of a Thriving Mum

If there’s one thing I’m deeply grateful for after everything I’ve been through (and still going through), it’s that I drew closer to God. But let me keep it real—I didn’t exactly start out grateful. Oh no, I was MAD. Like, “how-could-you-let-this-happen” mad. At first, I didn’t even realize I was mad at God, but when I did? Whewww, I gave Him an earful.

And that’s the beautiful thing about God—He’s not insecure. He can handle your rants, your wildest questions, and your angry “Why me?!” meltdowns. And trust me, I gave Him plenty of those. I asked Him the most ridiculous things, like, “Hello? Aren’t you God? Couldn’t you have stopped me from marrying him? Or zapped his heart to treat us better? Or, I don’t know, just fixed everything before it fell apart?!” It was a full-on venting session, and oh, I went in.

But here’s the twist: after I ran out of words (and tears), God was still there. Patient. Loving. Unshaken by my tantrums. And that’s when the healing began. Slowly, I realized I didn’t just need a quick fix for my situation—I needed a deep, unshakable relationship with my Creator. And you know what? God didn’t rush me. He didn’t shove rules or expectations down my throat. He met me exactly where I was. He held me through the bitterness (still working on that because, let’s be honest, some days it sneaks back in like an uninvited guest). He loved me the way I needed to be loved, and step by step, we started rebuilding our relationship.

This new walk with God? It’s beautiful. It’s raw. It’s real. And honestly, I don’t think I’d have it if I hadn’t gone through all that pain. I had to come to the end of myself—to the point where I thought, “Maybe it’s better if I just disappeared, well permanently (death).” But holding on to God became my lifeline. Through heartbreak, through a pregnancy that nearly broke me (that’s a WHOLE story for another day—check out my Instagram @ifeoluwaaaa if you want the tea), through moments where I thought I’d never smile again, God was my anchor.

So here I am, typing this with tears streaming down my face. Not sad tears—thankful ones. Because without Him, I wouldn’t be here. I wouldn’t be me. I guess this is my open love note to the One who held me when everything else crumbled.

And if you’re reading this, maybe this is for you too. Maybe you’ve lost faith in God, or maybe you’re just out here searching for something you can’t quite name. Well, God sent me to tell you: that He loves you more than you can imagine. He wants to be your friend, your gist partner, your provider, your anchor—whatever you need Him to be. With open hands, Jesus is saying, “Come.”

Give Him a chance. I promise you, that one decision will change your life in ways you never thought possible. 💕